That's what I wanted. I wanted to know what it was like to be "one flesh" with a brother. I wouldn't be surprised if this longing is part of what has been channeled into my same-sex attractions, in a misguided attempt to become one with another man the way that I would have been, by birth, one with a twin brother. Of course I couldn't really achieve that with a man through sex; I believe sexual activity between two men only ultimately pushes them farther apart, rather than binding them together. But the point is that I think it's that sort of unity with a man that I've been seeking. Just as with twins, it isn't the same kind of union as with a spouse, and therefore it's not in competition with the spousal relationship (nothing and no one could compete with the beautiful union I have with my wife, and I would never want to replace that), but it's a oneness that would be parallel to that sort of union.
Of course, I can't have a twin. Alas, when I was but a wee fertilized egg, I didn't split, and that's that. No second chances.
![]() |
| Like this, but we wouldn't be "fried" together. Say no to drugs, and all that. |
Is there a way to have this sort of union on this Earth, despite not having such a twin? Is there a way to have it with some man I know and love, be he literal brother or a close friend? I don't know. I know I love my brothers and my best friends enough for it. But can we ever be "as one?" Because, contrary to what some may think, that's what this is about. It's not about having a "clone" of myself because I'm so great and want someone who's just like me. It's about wanting to be "as one" with people. I have a deep desire for unity beyond imagining. Sometimes I even feel this toward strangers. I have an aching desire to unite, to be one with my brethren.
The good news is, whether or not we can have this on Earth, we will have it one day. See, around 2000 years ago, a certain God-Man named Jesus (perhaps you've heard of Him) prayed that all of His followers may be one. In John 18: 21, He prayed, "so that they may all be one, as you, Father, are in me and I in you, that they may also be in us." In just one sentence, this gives us a beautiful glimpse at what Heaven will be like. Unity. Perfect, unimaginable unity. I believe that, in Heaven we will all of us, in some mysterious way, be "one flesh" and have a profound unity of spirit. After all, the unity between the Father and the Son is so real that some early Christians mistakenly thought there was no distinction between them! So if we are to be "one" in a way approaching the oneness of the Son and the Father, then this unity is going to be profound and real. It's not just symbolic.
The good news is, whether or not we can have this on Earth, we will have it one day. See, around 2000 years ago, a certain God-Man named Jesus (perhaps you've heard of Him) prayed that all of His followers may be one. In John 18: 21, He prayed, "so that they may all be one, as you, Father, are in me and I in you, that they may also be in us." In just one sentence, this gives us a beautiful glimpse at what Heaven will be like. Unity. Perfect, unimaginable unity. I believe that, in Heaven we will all of us, in some mysterious way, be "one flesh" and have a profound unity of spirit. After all, the unity between the Father and the Son is so real that some early Christians mistakenly thought there was no distinction between them! So if we are to be "one" in a way approaching the oneness of the Son and the Father, then this unity is going to be profound and real. It's not just symbolic.
It seems to me that, in Heaven, we'll all have the sort of connection with each other that on Earth most readily exists between spouses or the sorts of twins I mentioned. We will share in each other's experiences. We'll know "what it's like" to be each other. And this unity is actually going to be much richer than even the most profound unions on this side of eternity. Because rather than having to be born out of similarities or (in the case of spouses) compatibility, it will transcend differences. We will each continue to have our own personalities in Heaven, and there will be differences and variety there, but at the same time we will be so much "as one" that I think each soul will know what it is to be every other soul, and vice versa.
I was once asked, by someone who craved unity as much as I do, "Is there a place where two souls can exist in the same space?" And I answered him "Yes, in Heaven." Because that's the place where somehow space will not be an insurmountable wall, where despite having distinct bodies (after the Resurrection) and distinct souls we will find that there are no more barriers, no more boundaries, that separate us from one another. Our oneness will be similar to the oneness of the Holy Trinity: Just as God is "One God in Three Persons" so too will we all be "One humanity in a multitude of persons." Just as with God, the persons will be distinct. But just as with God, the oneness will be real.
And I, for one, look forward to it. I will not cease to seek greater unity with my brethren on Earth where it can be found, but I will seek assurance in the hope that, whether I succeed or fail, one day I'll live the dream that even Jesus dreamed. Alleluia!

